Rock Music Calm

I turn on loud hard rock music

to drown out that part of my brain

that has conversations with nobody,

that wanders towards being insane.

I need to engage

with something that’s real.

Connect motion with thought,

that would be my ideal.

Go for a walk, not alone.

Talk to a person I can actually see,

even my grandson,

though he’s only three.

Push him in his stroller

‘til I’m feeling half dead.

Do the laundry, the dishes,

or bake some fresh bread.

Interact, not visualization.

Get out of my head.

Look at the clouds, and

paint their pictures instead.

Help my grandson ride his new bike.

Take a breath, and stretch. Make a list.

Meet my husband

for an afternoon tryst.

I need something. I need it right now.

And until I know what IT is,

screaming music will calm

my daydream dementia lunatic schiz.

by:  Paula D. Nevison